In Paws We Trust

Nine years ago
I looked after a sweet, little tabby called Milo
She was a girl, not a boy
I was heartbroken when I found out that she went over the rainbow

Because my ex-friend got bored of her like she was some toy

When was the last time I’ve seen Milo? I don’t know

But now I know she’s no longer suffering

From a ‘family,’ that means nothing

In paws we trust is the motto

I see a kitty, let me take a photo

Everyone knows that I’m the Cat Queen

“Cats are evil!” Hey, don’t be so mean

Every cat I meet, have amazing purrsonality

Ha, see what I did there? That’s the reality

When it was August 2022, I landed a cat-sitting job

“That’s not a real job!” It’s a job that I’m passionate about, don’t be a snob

I’m able to flex my knowledge of cat care

And meet all kinds of cats, fluffy, sleek or no hair

Everyone knows that I have a black cat called Donnie
He’s so cute, he’s so cuddly

He has big moonlit eyes that glow in the dark

I still remember his first scratch mark

Did you know that black cats are smart and easy to train

Cats are not just about beauty & brain

Got Donnie when he was a kitten

Always runs to the kitchen
Whenever I shout tuna or chicken

In paws we trust is the motto

If a guy says that he hates cats, he has got to go

Not worth my energy, it's time to hit unmatch

Donnie, use scratch

Okay, let’s not resort to violence

Eat your protein, that’s science

I’m calling all the pretty kitties

from all different cities

I’m calling all cat parents

Cats are the best antidepressants

In paws we trust is the motto

A wild kitty appeared, let’s get a photo

Bad Girl Era

I don't have any fucks for you to loan
Because I've walked this road on my own
Wake up, there's no such thing as normality
Don't you try to question my reality
When you can't even respect every boundary I've created
According to everyone, I'm complicated
If you can't handle my fire
Don't expect me to fulfil your desire

No, I don't need to explain why
I ain't going to comply
There's more to life than getting under my skin
The old me used to allow the weak to win

The game you're looking for is not available
Now you're the game, I turned the table
Do you fear me now? I hope you forget my name
This ain't build-a-bitch, us girls aren't the same
I don't want a man who is like my dad
I can't believe you don't get that no means no, that's sad
Not everything is about sex
Yet you chose to get back with your ex
Babe, that ain't a flex
Shame on you for setting bad examples for your daughter
Your weakness and my strength are like oil and water
You didn't have the backbone to tell me that it's over
Guess what exposed you? The hangover
Aw why are you frowning
You're the one that's drowning

I'm done with being too nice
Warning, I contain a lot of spice
I don't want to be treated like a princess, I wanna be treated like a queen
Being in a room full of toxicity? That ain't my scene

The girl I used to be, was easier to kill
Now I'm ready to spit on everyone's grave like Jennifer Hill

05/01/21

Dear grandma,

It's been more than a year
I still find it hard to believe that you're not here
You left this world since the third lockdown
I'll see you again when my soul leaves the ground

 I'm not kidding when I say wake me up when January ends
These weekends won't be the same anymore
On this day, I'm torn into pieces
When grief speaks, it increases

I remember when I was a kid, you used to put Jungle Book
Only to get me to eat my food, even though I didn't look
That was when you decided to give Donnie the nickname, Bhagira
and Mowgli was the nickname for cousin Noah
Remember playing Super Mario games on the Super Nintendo
Trust me, you were a pro

I wish I wasn't pretending to be okay
I still think about you every day

Thin Blood

 They say that blood is thicker than water
I don't believe in that shit when all you've been doing is treating me like a stranger
I'm ashamed of being your daughter
Especially when you go comparing me to your nieces
That broke my confidence into pieces

You try punishing me by giving me the silent treatment
You are mad because you've become everything you resent
You are mad because I'm someone you can no longer control
You'll never be able to crush my soul

I don't know how my mother puts up with your shit
Constantly throwing a fit when you don't get your way
Every time you put me down, you're describing yourself
I'm no longer the doll you've created and displayed on your shelf

I refuse to call you dad
When I do find a man that loves me for who I am, I hope you stay mad
I forgot you're fragile, my bad
Offended that I've broken the cycle by healing my inner child? Oh, how sad

I've cancelled my subscription because I'm done with your issues
You obviously don't know what it's like to be in my shoes
Treating women like property is your religion
Go ahead, paint me as the villain
 I'll keep playing the part
Yet, you won't admit that you don't have a heart 

The Spineless Act

 You thought I wouldn't know
You're the one that fucking let me go
I can look at you no more
For betraying me just to feed your ego
Guess what motherfucker, my heart can't be broken
The unholy act you've committed has spoken

All this time, I thought this love was real
Like a rose blooming with passion
Now you don't seem to care about how I fucking feel
Seems like disloyalty is the biggest trend in fashion
You tell me that you'll love me for eternity
Then suddenly you have done me dirty
Look at you now, good as dead
I'm not responsible for the mess you've caused, you've made your bed
I'm certain that we made a pact
That was not to commit the spineless act

Boy, you got something to hide
Do you think I wouldn't find out that you were fucking someone on the side
I hope you know that you're making the biggest mistake
I'm not to blame that your heart is about to break
"We ain't spoken in ages" What the fuck are you talking about
What you did to me made me feel like tearing my fucking heart out
I used to smile every time I saw or thought of you
Then you threw me away like I was some toy, I wish this was untrue
Now we're strangers with meaningless memories
I guess you ran out of moralities
Perfect The Way You Are by Dead By April used to be our song
I've gone off it now after you did me wrong

I thought you were The One
"I hope we can stay friends" Nah mate, we're fucking done!

The Sin in Sincere

 Hold up, let's rewind
I'm not deaf, I'm not blind
Don't tell me to off myself and then preach about 'being kind'
Hypocrisy is written all over your face and in your mind

There you go, posting verses from a religious book
That ain't a good look
I'm not religious but I believe you're putting the sin in sincere
The shit you say, I wish I could unhear

Expect me to give you that tone
When I tell you to leave me alone
I wish I never grew up thinking that it's normal to be hurt out of love
And expect me to believe in something from above
The bruise from my heart tells a story
Now you wanna say sorry
I don't forgive that easily
I wasn't born to make anyone happy

At night, how do you sleep?
The scars on my skin grow so deep
I felt the sin in sincere
You've never felt remorse or shed a tear

You've never cared about my happiness
You cared about the opinions of others
I'll never be another version of you
Because you destroyed my soul, black & blue
I can tell that you don't regret the pain you put me through

Now it all makes sense
I can see through your false pretence
You put the sin in sincere
My strength and independence are all you fear

Authentic Vibes Only

 Please stay away
Your toxicity has been tested positive
I'm not going to let you ruin my day
Your comments are so dismissive

I'm sick of pretending to be okay
Don't go telling me that you're just a phone call away
Sometimes I regret, writing down how I feel in an essay
There you go, invalidating my feelings when I'm trying to vent
This leads to a messy argument
Don't waste my time with your toxic positivity
I'm all about authentic vibes only

When I say authentic vibes only
I don't need your negative vibes draining my energy
I gotta go to my physical therapy
The gym is my first love, get in the bin with your derogatory
I'm sick of suppressing my pain when I'm feeling down
These stupid suggestions make me feel like I'm in a ghost town

These false feelings make me feel like I don't exist
I'm sick of feeling unheard and dismissed
Feels like a scar growing on my wrist
As I disappear into the mist

You better watch your back
I got mine and I'm gonna keep on track
I got priorities to savour
Ghost me, you're doing me a favour
The toxic positivity you speak
Makes you weak
Don't tell me to look on the bright side
I'll never be like you, I won't swallow my pride
Don't tell me to smile
Being authentic is my style

You're just as annoying as a mosquito
Oh my, did I hurt your ego?